12 Steps to Overcome Food Addiction
“One day you will tell your story of how you overcome what you went through and it will be someone else’s survival guide” - Brene Brown
During the lowest part of my life I used food as a drug. Food was my comfort any time I was low, I used it to numb my emotions. During my own transformation period, there were three things that helped me overcome and continue to manage this food addiction: the support of my friends, my personal relationship with the Lord, and the principles of a 12-step program. So today I want to help you recognize the signs of food addiction and determine if a 12 step program could do the same for you.
What is a 12 Step Program?
So what is a 12-step addiction program? There are a lot of different 12-step groups that deal specifically with food issues, such as Food Addicts Anonymous or Overeaters Anonymous. There are others that you may find through your church or another community center that are more similar to the one I went to, which was a 12-step program for people with all different kinds of addictions.
There’s a common bond with all addictions. Regardless of your vice, on a subconscious level, you are using it to manage your life, when in fact your life has become unmanageable because of that very addiction. It’s a vicious cycle.
Whatever group you choose, whether it’s specific to food addiction or addresses addiction in general, it most likely will follow the same 12 principles – a set of emotional and psychological
steps to help you recover from your addiction. The first of which is to admit you have a problem, and the second step is to believe (no matter what your religious affiliation) that a power greater than you can help you with that problem. You don’t have to call it “God.” You can call it “a higher power,” the “universe,” “spirit,” or anything you prefer. Personally, I call this power God.
Recognizing Food Addiction
In the midst of my food addiction, I couldn’t disentangle my self-worth from my weight, no matter how hard I tried. I looked at the circumstances in my life to justify my eating habits instead of confronting them for what they were – an addiction. So when I found out I was pregnant with my first child, it allowed me to give up again on losing weight. I let go of any attempts to control how much I ate, using my pregnancy as a handy reason for why I needed seconds at almost every meal and ice cream or pie for dessert—or even for breakfast! I would go so far as to tell my husband that I was heading to the gym to work out, when in reality I would go to the ice cream shop and sit on the lawn there to gorge on ice cream. I decided that I would focus on losing weight and eating healthy foods after I was holding my baby in my arms.
My emotions completely drove my eating habits: I ate when I was unhappy to comfort myself, and I ate when I was nervous. I ate when I wanted to reward myself for a job well done, and I ate when I felt angry and powerless. Food was my best friend. It was distorted proof to myself that I was in control of something. The toll it took on my self-esteem, my health, and, ultimately, my marriage was disastrous. And it took me far too long to draw the dots between my weight fluctuations and my deep-seated emotions.
You have your own unique story, so you might resonate with some of patterns I struggled with, but if not here are a few other common red flags that you’re battling food addiction:
You experience cravings, even after eating a full meal
You find it nearly impossible to restrict yourself with foods you love, one slice of cake usually turns into half a cake
You eat until you’re stuffed instead of comfortably full
You hide food, or feel guilty over your eating habits (like me and my ice cream)
You make regular excuses for your over consumption, “today was a hard day, I deserve a treat”
You’re unable to change your eating habits despite longing for change
“Do I need a 12 step program for my food addiction?”
12-step groups seem to have the best track record for long-term weight loss and recovery. Most 12 step groups don’t have a professional therapist leading them; instead, there will be people in different stages of recovery attending the meetings and helping others who are just starting on their personal journeys. Hearing others speak with great honesty will help support your own recovery journey.
Another benefit of a 12-step program is how accessible and empowering they are. Most often, they are free and offer virtual meetings each week. You deal with your addiction at your own pace with support so that you don’t feel alone.. If you need help along the way, you simply ask for it from one of the many sponsors (experienced members) that are available for phone calls, every day—no waiting around for an appointment with a therapist when you’re feeling low!
There are also excellent group guidelines that will make you feel safe, like “no cross talk,” which means people do not interrupt, comment upon, or refer to someone else’s sharing. You are not required to share. I will tell you however, that when you are ready, sharing without interruption, in a safe place, will help you find your voice.
Best of all, 12-step programs help you deal with the emotions and behaviors that have been fueling your addiction while giving you the tools you need to deal with the problems in your life that have led you to this place and may be keeping you there. It’s not about the food. It’s about how you use the food to manage your life.
What are the 12 Steps?
The steps are written in the past tense to show that each step was followed in order to achieve sobriety. Additionally, the steps are written in plural form to show that it was done together as opposed to doing it alone. This is a very important concept. Isolation can be so detrimental to your success.
1. Admitted we were powerless over our food addiction—that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God the Eternal Father and His Son as we understood them.
4. Made a searching and fearless written moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. We’re entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we tried to carry this message to food addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
The Mind Body Connection
But, a 12 step program isn’t purely a logical one. Simply understanding the steps above won’t cut it. There are profound spiritual concepts embedded at the root of each of the steps that are meant to help you forge a stronger connection between your mind, your body, and your spirit. Embracing these concepts is what opens the door to true transformation in overcoming food addiction.
Step One: Honesty
Step Two: Hope
Step Three: Faith (Trust in God)
Step Four: Courage (Truth)
Step Five: Integrity (Confession)
Step Six: Willingness (Change of Heart)
Step Seven: Humility
Step Eight: Self-Discipline (Seeking Forgiveness)
Step Nine: Love for Others (Restitution and Reconciliation)
Step Ten: Perseverance (Daily Accountability)
Step Eleven: Spiritual Awareness (Personal Revelation)
Step Twelve: Service
Other Helpful Resources
If you enjoyed these tips, then I’m creating my comprehensive guide to overcoming food addiction just for you – join the waitlist here to be the first to know when it’s available.
In case this is the first time we’re connecting, I’m Jill, an entrepreneur, speaker, author, and leader inspiring other women to live out their God given purpose by helping them overcome physical, mental, and financial hardships. If you liked this blog post and want more where that came from, here are a few ways we can work together:
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